Saturday, 28 February 2015

Thoughts of the month

1. I learned an awesome trick this month. To stop your dishwasher stinking you sprinkle bicarb soda on the bottom. Magic. Works brilliantly.

2. I am not at all interested in the 50 Shades of Grey movie. I'm not interested in the books either. 

3. Ellie Goulding is awesome.

4. I'm so pleased that I have more than one thought this month.

5. After my fitbit died months ago, I finally replaced it with a fitbit charge. It's awesome. Once again I'm motivated to move more. There are several evenings I've jogged on the spot to get my steps up.

6. Chai being at kindy is wonderful and awful at the same time. I love having a bit of time out, but I hate not knowing what he's doing all day and not having him with me. 

7. I can only imagine what it's going to be like when Eljay is at kindy too.

8. Why do people immediately assume the worst when they see people of the opposite sex together? I was walking around town this month with a friend of mine (male) and a few people who knew me gave us both such a look. Really? If I could be bothered having an affair (which I couldn't, I have enough trouble dealing with Tiger and the boys without adding another man into the mix!), I wouldn't be walking around town with him! 

9. I'm eagerly awaiting the return of winter. 

10. I've already started eyeing off the cardigans and boots I want to wear this winter. 

Friday, 27 February 2015

FFS Friday - Sneezy McSniffy

Hello people! Happy Friday! It's a long weekend here in WA. An extra long weekend for us cause Chai doesn't have kindy today so we get another day with him. Love it.

I'm so pleased to say that Chai still loves kindy. Not FFS.

He now complains about not being able to go to kindy every day. FFS.

I can't win. FFS.

Hayfever season is back. FFS.

I fear it may be the death of me. FFS.

I'm quickly sniffing and sneezing myself to death. FFS.

So who's watched the film clip to Sia's Elastic Heart? People keep on saying how moving and profound it is. 

I am neither moving nor profound because I don't get it. I just think it's weird. FFS. 

Clearly I'm missing something. FFS.

Yesterday morning we rolled up at kindy without Chai's bag. FFS.

No water bottle, no lunch, no hat, nothing. FFS.

Tiger had to race home and get it. FFS.

Well done to us. FFS.

Episode three of things I never thought I'd say as a mother:
Get your penis away from my foot!  
I do not want to put my foot on your penis!
Do not put your head near Bella's vagina!
Please do not touch your brothers penis.

What is it with boys and their willies? The willy obsession is inbuilt from birth, I'm sure of it. Once they find it as babies they never have their hand off it. Spose that doesn't change when they grow up either. FFS.

Bella has been barking a lot at night lately, she stares at the fence and barks continuously. Sunday night I found out why. FFS.

There's a woman who stands outside our house talking on her mobile. FFS.

WTF she can't stand inside or outside her own house I have no idea. FFS.

Especially at 11pm. FFS.

I just don't get people, they're so strange.

That concludes my weekly whinge. I hope it's been as good for you as it was for me. 

I have the in laws here at the moment, lucky me. FFS.

Have a great weekend!


Wednesday, 25 February 2015


It's very rare that I do a FOTD post, something I've decided to rectify. As you can see from my stunned mullet face, I've yet to master the appropriate FOTD expression, I'll get there one day but meanwhile you can have a good laugh at my stunned mullet expression.
I'd had a rough few nights so in this FOTD kept things minimal and worked on making myself look semi decent. Bright lipstick is a great way to detract attention from dark circles and tired eyes (at least that's what I tell myself).

Products used:
L'oreal Nude Magique Eau de Teint foundation - I am really loving this foundation. I bought it after seeing it on Natalie's blog and as per usual, she was right, it's amazing. I'm surprised that such a light, watery textured foundation could give good coverage, but it does.

Benefit Fake Up - This is a long time favourite for me. I use it nearly every day and have barely made a dent, I can see it will last me for ages. 

Shu Uemura Hard Brow Pencil - My holy grail brow pencil. I've tried other pencils but nothing compares to this. It has a great, hard texture, the colour is perfect for me and it lasts all day without smudging or fading. 

Rimmel ScandalEyes by Kate Mascara - I'm still deciding if I love this or not. I always find the first few weeks of using a new mascara it's hit and miss. I'm reserving judgement for the time being. 

Innoxa Liquid Liner in navy - This is one of the best felt tipped liners I've ever used. It gives a lovely thin line and lasts all day without fading.

Nars Dragon Girl lipstick - If I could only wear one red lipstick for the rest of my life it'd be Dragon Girl. The colour is perfect, it's long lasting and non drying. I can wear this all day and only have minimal fading. Perfection.

Hourglass Ethereal Glow Ambient Lighting Blush - I'm seriously considering getting rid of all my other blushes and just keeping my Ambient Lighting blush. It's the only blush I've used for the last four months. I love that it's so easy to use, the colour is gorgeous and no matter how much I apply I don't look like a clown.

Hourglass Luminous Light Ambient Lighting Powder - This is one of those products that totally lives up to the hype. It makes my skin look airbrushed, something I desperately need at the moment.

Monday, 23 February 2015

Rimmel Provocalips

Since I've had children I'm all about long lasting lipsticks. I used to be a gloss girl, but gloss and babies just don't mix, so my beautiful glosses sit there neglected and my lipsticks get all the love these days. I do love a bright lip, but again, that's not something that plays well with babies. Due to that, I've been on the hunt for a great, long lasting lipstick for years now (nearly four to be precise). I've found a few good ones but they've always had a negative, whether they be too drying, wear unevenly, peel off if I put lip balm over the top, smell bad or any other number of reasons. I didn't have high hopes when I tried out my first Provocalips but holy wow, these things are amazing. They're by far the best long lasting lipstick I've ever used. 

Seriously, I can't find fault with them. They have great pigment, they aren't drying, they last until they're removed, smell pleasant and I can use a balm or gloss over the top. The lasting power is truly amazing. I was in a rush one morning and put Skinny Dipping on before racing out the door. When I looked in the mirror a little later I realised it looked awful on me so scrubbed at my lips with my finger. It didn't budge. Not even a little bit. I was stuck with awful looking lips till I got home. Of course it had to be on a day when I was busy and out all day!

Lucky me won all eight shades in a competition, so I can show you swatches of each colour. 

With flash
Skinny Dipping, Make Your Move, Dare to Pink, I'll Call You, Little Minx, Kiss Fatal, Kiss Me You Fool, Play With Fire.
Natural light
I have lip swatches coming soon, so check back if you'd like to see them.

You can get Provocalips for only $17.95 from Priceline, Kmart, Target, Big W and chemists.
Skinny Dipping, Make Your Move, Dare to Pink, I'll Call You, Little Minx, Kiss Fatal, Kiss Me You Fool, Play With Fire.

Friday, 20 February 2015

FFS Friday - Monster

This week I discovered a whole new type of hell. FFS.

Transformers. FFS.

Chai loves them. FFS.

My cousin gave us a pile that her son no longer wants and OMG, they are a nightmare. FFS.

They're supposed to be kids toys and yet you need a mechanical engineering degree to transform the stupid things. FFS.

You can guarantee that after I've spent half an hour transforming Bumblebee into a car accompanied by Chai alternating between asking if I've finished yet and whining that it's taking too long, within five minutes he'll want Bumblebee to be a robot again. FFS.

Damned stupid things. FFS.

Don't get me started on Optimus Prime. He's impossible to transform into a truck, even with instructions. FFS.

Valentines day was one of those days. FFS.

Eljay woke up at 5am and wouldn't go back to sleep. FFS.

Chai woke up not long after in a horrible, sad, I miss Daddy mood. FFS.

That never makes for a good day. FFS.

Nothing I try makes him happy. FFS.

I decided we needed to get out of the house to take Chai's mind off his misery. Not FFS.

Whilst I was trying to get us ready both kids spent the whole time fighting, screaming, yelling and hitting each other. FFS.

By the time I finally got us all into the car I was exhausted and totally drained. Then Tiger called to complain I hadn't said happy valentines day and I started crying. FFS.

He has nofaking idea what it's like when he's away. FFS.

In his wildest dreams he couldn't imagine what it's like. FFS.

What I wouldn't give to be the one who gets to go to work sometimes. FFS.

I won't bother telling you about the rest of the day but suffice to say that it involved screaming (from the kids as well as me), Chai pooing outside, Eljay damaging my hearing with his screaming, Bella digging holes all through the lawn and me wondering why the hell I wanted kids so desperately. FML. FFS.

When Chai is behaving like that Tigers solution is "If I was there I would have smacked him". FFS.

What a stupid idea. When you're upset, how is someone hitting you supposed to fix things? Would that make you feel better? No. FFS.

Next time Tiger is upset I'll slap him to see if it helps him feel better. Then maybe he'll understand why smacking an upset child isn't a good idea. FFS.

Sunday I did something disgusting. FFS.

Actually Chai did it. FFS.

We were out at the playground when all of a sudden he was busting to do a poo. FFS.

There were no toilets around and we'd walked there from my sisters house so going home wasn't an option. FFS.

I was trying to find a secluded spot in the bush but the poor little tyke was busting so badly that he couldn't even stand still. FFS.

In the end he was so desperate he ripped down his pants and did a poo right on the edge of the path. FFS.

Of course it was a monster poo! FFS.

How such a huge poo came out of my little boy I have no idea. FFS.

Naturally he got poo and wee all over his shorts. FFS.

Thankfully he had boxer shorts on so I just took his shorts off and he was happy. Not FFS.

So there I was standing next to the path looking at a monster poo with nothing to clean it up. FFS.

There were no dog poo bags around, I had nothing in my bag other than mini baby wipes which were nowhere near big enough to pick it up. FFS.

I couldn't even find leaves or sand to cover it with but I didn't want to leave it there so I tipped the water from my water bottle all over it. It made no difference at all. FFS.

In the end I was forced to leave the monster poo there. FFS.

Disgusting. FFS.

I went back the next day and got rid of it. Disgusting. FFS.

Gross, gross, gross.

You can just imagine what it looked and smelled like after sitting in the hot sun for a whole day. FFS.

Disgusting doesn't even begin to describe it.

It's occurred to me that I'm doing all you childless people a favour. Who needs to buy contraception when you can just read my FFS Friday posts. You're welcome. 

Wednesday, 18 February 2015


Things have been tough lately, I've been struggling and I haven't been the mother I want to be. I've been angry, short tempered and disengaged. 

Chai has settled well into kindy, he likes it and is happy to go. I watched him as he walked in to kindy today, he was so cute. He made sure he said hello to all his teachers, put his things away and then walked around the room saying hello to his friends. One boy he wanted to say hello to had his back to Chai, so he put his hand in the middle of his back then stood at his side to say hello. It was so cute and so grown up, I felt really proud. 

It's strange seeing him grow up. Already I'm having to let go a little bit. I feel slightly distant to him since he's started kindy, he has a whole part of his life that I know very little about. The temptation to keep him home is strong, but I don't. He needs kindy. He's a very social child so kindy is good for him. Plus, keeping him busy gives him less time to think about how much he misses Tiger when he's away. And it gives him time away from his brother. 

For the past few months he's been constantly telling me that he doesn't want Eljay. A few times he's even said that he wants the Dr to get rid of Eljay. I'm hoping kindy will give him the space that he needs so that he can enjoy spending time with his brother.

It's also nice for me to have some time alone with Eljay. He loves having me all to himself, we get to play, dance and read without Chai and I can see how much Eljay enjoys it.

So after all my whinging about kindy, it's turning out well. I'm so, so happy I can say that. 

January Favourites

Essence BB cream - I was pleasantly surprised with this. Combined with the Eco Tools Perfecting brush, it gives great, matte coverage. For only $8.20 you really can't go wrong.

Essence The Lash Curler mascara* - This is the first Essence mascara I've tried and I really like it. It gives a great curl that holds for half a day, which is better than most other curling mascaras I've tried.

Ulta 3 Special Effect Peek a Boo Purple nail polish - It is very rare for me to have painted fingernails. I just don't have time for the maintenance and I hate having chipped nail polish. When I saw the Essence watercolour polishes I had to buy one. They're a very sheer tint that can be worn alone or over the top of a white (or light) polish. I've been wearing two coats for a sheer tint that doesn't show chips easily.

Shore Soap Co Tea Tree Moisturizer stick - Moisturising sticks are a lazy/busy persons best friend. All I do is swipe it on and I'm done, I don't even rub it in. The bonus of this one is that it smells amazing, so I don't need to use perfume.

Subtle Energies Reviving body and hand wash* - My love of Subtle Energies is well known. They truly can do no wrong. I use the Reviving body and hand wash as a hand wash, if I put it in the shower Tiger would use it and it'd be gone in a second. I love the beautiful, fresh scent and how gentle this is on my hands.

The Body Shop Smoky Poppy* - Floral lovers, you need this in your life. It's limited edition so get it now whilst you can. I'm not normally a fan of deep/intense scents but this is a really sexy scent that I can wear without feeling like it's overpowering.

Maybelline Lychee Addict Baby Lips lip balm -  This smells like cake! I know it's lychee flavoured but it smells like cake. I thought I might have been imagining it but I asked Emma and she agrees. Yum!

Eco Tools Perfecting brush - I saw this on iHerb (use code YUF175 to get a discount off your first iHerb order) and the thought of using a brush to apply BB intrigued me so of course I bought it. In the past I've always used my fingers to apply BB however I'm now a brush convert. Applying my BB with a brush gives a gorgeous, flawless finish. It also means that I can build up coverage in areas that need a little more help.

Du'it Foot and Heal Balm Plus -For the first time in my life I have a cracked heel. Ouch! The first few days it was so sore that it was waking me up at night and walking hurt. Since I've never had a cracked heel I didn't know how to fix it so I asked Tiger and he told me the secret is to moisturise it. I had no idea which moisturiser to use so I went with Du-it and I'm very glad I did. The crack is still there but my feet are a lot less dry, my foot isn't sore and it's healing nicely. Clearly it's time I started paying more attention to my feet!

* These products were provided for review.

Monday, 16 February 2015

January Empties and tosses

I'm pleased to say that this year is off to a great start empties wise, I finished a whole pile of products! I also tossed out more unused, unloved and old products. 
ASAP Sheer Tint moisturiser - If I didn't have a whole pile of tinted moisturisers and BB's to use up, I'd buy this in a heartbeat. It has great coverage, much more than you'd expect from the name, it's hydrating and makes my skin look lovely.

Versace Versense shower gel - This is a gorgeous, fresh summer scent that I really enjoy.

Avene Eau Thermale Spring water - Not much to say about this. It's awesome, I use it all the time.

Avon Sparkling Sugar body spray - I used this as an air freshener. The scent is lovely, however I prefer the lasting power of perfume, I can't be bothered constantly reapplying a body spray. No idea why I even bought this. It made a great air freshener.

Allure Sensuelle perfume - One of my top ten favourite perfumes. If I wasn't trying to reduce the number of perfumes I own I'd repurchase this straight away. Once my perfume collection is under control this is a definite repurchase.

Bellamer Eye Balm - Love! This was a heaven sent for my irritated, dry, flaky hayfever eyes. 

People for Plants body scrub - Surprisingly I liked this. I say surprisingly because I like a really scrubby scrub that I usually only get from salt or sugar scrubs. This isn't as scrubby as a salt/sugar scrub but it has a decent amount of scrubbiness and was pleasant to use.

C}4U Colour Addict shampoo and conditioner - Nice but not amazing.

Ego Sun Sense Sport sunscreen - We used this when we were swimming. It was okay but not wonderful, I won't buy it again.

Baby Organics nappy lotion - This is a toss, I didn't like it, it was very runny and did nothing to help with Eljay's nappy rash.
I cleaned out my make-up drawer and this is the pile of unloved products that ended up in the bin. I love decluttering. It's so satisfying.
I threw both of these lipsticks out. I was trying to use them out as part of my Project Life Detox however when I thought about it I realised that they are ancient. When I say ancient I mean at least ten years old. Yuck! I bought them before I met Tiger. We've been together for nine years and I had them for quite a while before I met him, so they are probably twelve years old. And I was using them! Amazingly, they aren't off, they smell and taste fine, however I really don't want to be using something so old on my lips. Imagine the germs. Gross. Also, I don't love the colours and Project Life Detox is about getting rid of things that no longer serve me please me or nourish me, so out they went.

Friday, 13 February 2015

FFS Friday - Melting

Hello and welcome to another edition of FFS Friday, aka Laugh at My Misfortune.

Eljay tried to drown himself again last week. FFS.

The child just won't learn. FFS.

This time he was under the water for a little while thanks to me. FFS.

We were watching him and I was on the step with him when he went for the third step, but he lay on his stomach and looked like he was going to swim so I watched to see if he would. He didn't. FFS.

I fished him out when he started to sink. FFS.

I was fully clothed and ended up soaking wet. FFS.

Not wanting to miss out on the action, Bella also tried to drown herself. FFS.

She slipped into the pool. FFS.

She made it to the edge but then couldn't get out. FFS.

Thankfully I was watching and Tiger and the boys were in the pool, so we got her out quickly with no harm done. Not FFS.

It has been sofa king hot here lately, most days have been 41 or over. FFS.

I am not built for the heat. FFS.

I am built for winter. I am a lean, mean cold weather machine. In winter. 
Anything over 30 and I do not cope. FFS.

All I want to do is lay around in a limp, sweaty heap. FFS.

As if that wasn't bad enough, we had the PIL's here as well. FML. FFS.

Sunday we had friends over for a bbq and MIL started questioning them wanting to know who had "alcohol in them". FFS.

Turns out she wanted someone to drive her to the servo to get the paper. FFS.

I know. WTF? FFS.

No idea why FIL couldn't drive her. FFS.

Or why she couldn't drive herself. FFS.

My sister agreed to drive her. FFS.

I said no. Not FFS.

So then she questioned everyone to see if they had the paper in their car. FFS.

Cause people usually drive around with the Sunday paper in their car, then hand it over to random strangers to read. FFS.

Despite his ill health FIL has a terrible diet. Silly man. FFS.

Sunday night I totally forgot that he refuses to eat cooked veggies and made vegetarian lasagne for tea. FFS.

He barely ate any of it and when Tiger asked him if he liked it he grumpily said he "wouldn't pay money for it". FFS.

Ungrateful bastard. Sofa king rude. FFS. 

Next time he can cook his own tea. 

He'd never do that though. Next time I'll make a vegetarian stir fry. Heh.

I am now a "kindy mum". FFS.

The transition to kindy has been a lot better for Chai this week. He's been so brave. Not FFS.

The last two days I've dropped him off and he's bravely said goodbye whilst trying not to cry. FFS/Not FFS.

I hate seeing him upset. FFS.

I also hate leaving him when he's upset. FFS.

I have no idea what he does at kindy. All I can get out of him is that they play in the playground, line up at the door (which he thinks is exciting so he laughs and laughs and laughs) and they watch sharks on the big screen. 

It's very strange not having him around. It's also quite lovely. I can spend time with Eljay and I can also get housework done. Not FFS.

I'm beginning to remember what it was like when I just had Chai, life was so much easier then. 

That's the end of my weekly whine. It's your turn now.  

Thursday, 12 February 2015

Losing myself?

My sister is doing a course at the moment and they asked everyone to tell three things about themselves. It couldn't be anything to do with their partners/ex partners or kids. When I thought about it, I really struggled to come up with three things. In my single life I would have easily come up with three things. I can still come up with three things about my single and pre children life. But my life now, not so easy. My life now is all about the kids. It's not about me. I've lost myself to motherhood.

I hear people talking about women who lose themselves to motherhood like it's a bad thing. Sometimes it probably is. I'm happy to have lost myself to my kids for the time being. They are young, I am their whole world and they need me. I'm okay with that. When they are both at school (if I don't home school), I will get myself back again. I won't find myself again as I already know who I am. I haven't forgotten. I know exactly who I am. I spent many years finding out who I am. Right now I am Chai and Eljay's mother. I always will be. But in a few years time when they don't need me so much I'll also be other things. I'll get a job, I'll have more time to spend with friends, I will be many other things. But I will always be their mum and I will never regret having temporarily lost myself to motherhood.


Wednesday, 11 February 2015

Eye Creams I'm Loving

I have trouble finding eye creams as a lot of the anti-aging eye creams irritate my sensitive, allergy prone eyes. So for all of you who have sensitive eyes like I do, here are some of the eye creams that I can use with no irritation. 

Alpha-H Age Delay Intensive Eye and Lip Treatment Cream* - I've been using this around my lips and on my eyes for months now and I'm very happy with it. It seems to be more effective on my lips than my eyes, although I'm sure the lines around my eyes are a little less noticeable. This is quite a rich cream, it feels quite balm like in texture. Despite being rich, it sinks in quickly and I can apply my makeup a few minutes after application. This is the eye cream that I use every day. 

Estee Lauder Advanced Night Repair Eye - This is one of those cult products that is actually worth the hype. All too often hyped up products are a disappointment, however that's not the case with ANR eye. I use this at night and wake up looking refreshed, which is pretty amazing considering I haven't had an uninterrupted nights sleep for around five years now. I use this when I need to look semi presentable in the mornings.

NAT. Face agebloc eye gel and eye cream* - I'm reviewing these as one because I use them together. I use the eye gel in the morning and the cream in the evening. These are quite powerful so at first I only used them once a week. Over time I built up to using them every second day. The results are brilliant, my fine lines and wrinkles are smoothed and not as noticeable. They're still there, but they don't look as pronounced as they did before.

Ole Henricksen Ultimate Lift Eye Gel - Caroline Hirons loves this, so of course I had to try it. It's a lovely, light gel that I like to use in the mornings. I haven't noticed any impressive results, however it's hydrating and non irritating. Despite being a light gel, my eye area feels hydrated and comfortable all day.

Kosmea Apple of my Eye Cream - I love the name of this, it's so clever, I find it very amusing, possibly I am getting too used to child humour. This is another one that I had to ease into using. I used it daily at first but found it irritating, so I switched to using it every second day and that worked well. I'm now onto my second tube and I love the results. My fine lines are less noticeable and my eyes look fresher.

What's your favourite eye cream? If you know of an eye cream that helps to get rid of dark circles, please share!

* These products were provided for review

Tuesday, 10 February 2015

Yard Skincare Lip Bloss

I can hear you all asking "what on earth is a Bloss?" I'll tell you. It's the lovechild of a balm and a gloss. Combine them both and what do you get? A Bloss! Clever isn't it.
I have two Blosses, Balmoral Bliss and Sardinia Spirit. There are going to be more in my future too, I can see it! Le Jardin will be my next purchase because it's purple!

All Blosses are hand made using natural ingredients. They give a lovely sheer wash of moisturising colour and the best bit is that they smell and taste amazing! I love a yummy flavoured lip product and my Blosses are up there with the best.
They come in gorgeous little tins that are easy to put in my pocket or hangbag and they screw on so that the lid doesn't come loose when it's being carted around.

Yard Skincare are a small Australian company hand-making 100% natural lip care and body products. All their products are made from natural, plant derived or organic ingredients.

I purchased Balmoral Bliss from The Natural Supply Co for $12.95 and I won Sardinia Spirit in a Yard Skincare competition.
For those who were wondering about the backdrop I used, it's this gorgeous plaque that Dad gave me.

Monday, 9 February 2015

Project Life Detox - Kitchen

I'm really enjoying Project Life Detox, it's been very satisfying so far. My diet is going okay, it still needs work but I'm getting there. I eat less sugar, I've given myself one treat day a week which is working well however I don't always manage to stick to it.

I've deleted and unsubscribed from hundreds of emails. I'm getting so many fewer emails now, it's great. Whenever I get an email I'm not interested in I unsubscribe. I also went through and deleted all my old emails, there were thousands of them clogging up my inbox.

I've done a big make-up and skincare clean out, made a list of all my skincare so I know what I have and I'll continue to get rid of products that I don't love. I still have a long way to go, but I'm getting there. I'm being really brutal with my culling, if it's not love then the product goes. It feels a little wasteful getting rid of products when there's nothing wrong with them, but the truth is that they'll just sit around until they go off, so I may as well get rid of them.  

This month I'm working on clearing out the kitchen. I'll go through each drawer and toss things that are broken, containers without lids etc. I'm also going to throw out all the recipes I've collected. They take up a whole heap of space and I never use them. When I need a recipe I google it. I'll keep a few that I've made and love, but the rest will go. 

The fridge, freezer and pantry are going to get a huge clean out too. 

Sunday, 8 February 2015

Kindy thoughts

Whilst I've got my rant on I'm going to continue with my kindy complaints. Maybe I'm strange but the whole thing seems so bizarre to me.

I'm expected to leave my most precious thing in the whole world with a total stranger and a whole pile of children I know nothing about. I leave him and have no idea what he's doing, what they are saying to him, who he's with. Is it just me or does that seem bizarre?

I'm not surprised that he doesn't want to be left at a strange place, with people he doesn't know. I wouldn't like it either. And I'm trying to convince him it's fun. People are trying to convince me it's good for him. Really? Trusting my child to a stranger I know nothing about. I know her name and that's it. Is she nice? Does she like children? Does she have children or grandchildren of her own? Does she believe in gentle parenting or is she going to tell him to toughen up and not be a baby? 

What does he do when he's at kindy? Are they teaching him things that I want him to learn? Are they teaching him to be a good person? Kind, loving and considerate? 

I know that I think differently to a lot of people but kindy and school seem so alien to me. I know children need to be educated but why don't we teach them practical things about life? Why don't we teach them how to look after a house, manage a budget, cook etc? How to be a good person, how to care for others, things that matter. 

I am strongly considering home schooling or unschooling my boys. It makes a lot of sense to me. I hated school right from the start. I hated it from when I went to pre school. And it didn't change, I hated school right up to the day I left. Those were the worst years of my life (my home life didn't help either). Bearing that in mind, I'm not going to home school the boys unless it's right for them. I'll give Chai (and Eljay when he's old enough) the chance to try school. If it works for them and they enjoy it, that's great. If they don't, I'll home school.  

Saturday, 7 February 2015

FFS Saturday

I know, I'm late with my FFS Friday post, so today I present to you FFS Saturday. Has a good ring to it doesn't it? I had a lovely list of whinges to write about, but they have all been overshadowed by kindy. FFS.

This week my baby Chai started kindy. FFS.

Someone hold me. FFS.

I am not ready for this. FFS.

Actually, I lie, I am so ready for this! FFS.

I was optimistically hoping that it would go well, but I knew it wouldn't. FFS.

It didn't. FFS.

We've been trying to prepare Chai for kindy, talking to him about it, explaining what will happen etc and he was getting excited about it. The first day went okay until he realised we were going to leave him there. FFS.

We'd told him we had to leave him there but when it came time to leave he got really upset. FFS.

In the end I walked out and the teacher had to pull him crying out of Tigers arms. FFS.

I could hear him crying from outside the school gates. FFS.

It was fucking awful. FFS.

I hated it. FFS.

Just thinking about it makes me cry. FFS.

I fucking hate kindy. FFS.

I hate leaving my baby. FFS.

I want to pick him up and run away, far far away where there is no kindy and he can be with me forever. Where he isn't sad or upset or crying, where he's happy and playing. If anyone knows such a place, please give me the address, I'll meet you there. 

They said they'd call me if he didn't settle and I didn't get a phone call. Not FFS.

When I picked him up he was happy, he got a bit teary when he saw me but he said that he'd had fun. Not FFS.

He told me that he wasn't going back to kindy, it was fun playing but he doesn't like kindy and is just going to stay with me. Sounds good to me. 

The next day when we told him he had to go to kindy the tears started. Fuck.

It was awful. We managed to get him there and had the same problem. FFS.

Once again we left him crying. FFS.

I felt awful. Actually, awful doesn't even cover it. FFS.

Tiger picked him up and he was happy and said he'd had a good time. The teacher said that he was only upset for a few minutes and then he was fine. I'm not sure if I believe her or not. I want to believe her. 

We've spent a lot of time talking to Chai about kindy and he seems a little happier about it now. I'm not looking forward to next week though, I'll be alone and he has to go three days. Fun. FFS.

I may just run away with him to somewhere he can be my baby forever. 

Wednesday, 4 February 2015

The Body Shop Smoky Poppy range

Displaying Smoky Poppy Selection.jpg This Valentines Day The Body Shop has released a beautiful new range, Smoky Poppy. I was lucky enough to get my hands on it and let me tell you, you need it!

The Body Shop says: Discover Smoky Poppy's forbidden secret. Our Smoky Poppy collection is infused with the extract of oil-rich hand-picked red poppy flowers from the Ankara region of Turkey for a dose of blissfully addictive moisture. Seducing all who dare try, its black seeds also pack a heady dose of rich oil. Our most sensual and indulgent body care collection exudes a seductive, euphoric scent that will leave you longing for more. 

I was really intrigued when I first heard about smoky poppy, I wasn't sure if it was going to smell like a bushfire or if it'd smell nice. Happily, it smells nice. I'm not great at describing scents, however to me it smells like a very sexy floral.

I was sent the shower gel and body butter to review and I've already purchased back ups. The body butter is for normal skin so it's not too heavy for summertime use. I've been using it on my arms and legs, it absorbs quickly and I'm left with a lovely, soft scent. The shower gel is gorgeous, Tiger likes the scent too and has been using it every day.

I'm hoping that I'll get the Deluxe Gift for Valentine's Day as it contains the Eau de Toilette which is only available in the gift and can't be purchased individually.

The range consists of:
Body butter $23.95
Shower gel  $9.95
Massage oil $27.95
Bath bombs $29.95
Body scrub  $23.95
Body lotion  $16.95 

If you are a fan of sexy floral scents, get down to The Body Shop before it's too late!

*Note- these products were provided for review.

Monday, 2 February 2015

Dear Eljay

My precious son. Today you are 18 months old. 18 months! Already! I feel like you are growing up so much faster than your brother. I want to soak in every second I have with you but it feels like it's been a whirlwind.

You are a beautiful, happy and mischievous little tot. You love to climb, read and play with Bella. Your favourite toys are your bike, balls and balloons. If we're out and you spot a balloon you make a huge fuss until you get it. 

You go so fast on your little bike, you'll get a run up and crash into the front door, laugh then turn around and do it again. You have no fear. You're the same when climbing and in the pool. You climb everything. I leave the room for a few seconds and when I come back in you'll be on the table, tv cabinet, top of the lounge chair etc. You're the same at the playground, you'll climb right to the top without any hesitation.

Swimming is one of your favourite things to do, you're a water baby. You love baths and showers too, anything that involves water. I regularly find you standing in Bella's water bowl.

My beautiful baby, you are my world and I'm so glad you chose me to be your mother.