Sunday, 15 October 2017

Thoughts of the week

This Harvey Weinstein scandal is fascinating. It's not just him and the film industry though, it happens everywhere, in every industry.

It happens to women so often that we think it's normal and shrug it off as nothing, but it's not nothing and it's not okay. We need to stand up and not let behaviour like this be accepted. We need to do this for our children and our children's children. Men need to stand up too. 

Society as a whole needs to stand up and say that the mistreatment of women is unacceptable and should stop. A women should be able to go about her daily business without the threat of sexual harassment.

Through my career it's happened to me and on none of those occasions did I speak out. The first time it happened was at my first full time job. I was 16, vulnerable and naive. I worked at a shoe shop. My boss, Adrian, was a chauvinist pig of a man. Every time I was up the ladder getting shoes, he'd come to talk to me so that he could look up my skirt. It only stopped when I "accidentally" kicked him in the face. Hah. 

After that he started coming up behind me and putting his arms around me. That stopped when I elbowed him in the belly. I didn't say anything to anyone about those incidents, in fact I didn't think much of them at all, it was just one of those things that happen to women. 

Years later I worked with a federal police officer. I had to go to him to ask for information I needed for my investigations. He wouldn't give me the information for at least half an hour because he wanted to talk to me. It wasn't work talk, it was just personal chat. Not appropriate. I told my supervisors but nothing was done. Unsurprising.

The worst case I had was a boss who harassed myself and our entire team on an ongoing basis for about two years. His behaviour with me was totally inappropriate. Despite being married, he decided he was in love with me and acted like a stroppy, lovesick teenager. I never encouraged him, in fact I actively discouraged him, to no avail. 

The deputy manager suspected something inappropriate was going on so he spoke to my boss, but never spoke to me or the rest of the team. 

When he finally left I gave a file full of evidence to the deputy manager. Why didn't any of us say anything? Because we knew if we did he'd get away with it and we would ruin our careers. So we stayed silent. 

It's time we all woke up, stood up and stopped things like this happening. We should not be silent. It's time to make a change.

Friday, 13 October 2017

FFS Friday - Pants on fire

As a general rule I don't lie to my kids. 

Every now and again out of desperation, I do. It never ends well.

A few weeks ago I was getting the boys ready for a play date. It was really cold but Eljay would not wear appropriate clothing. He wanted to wear shorts and a singlet. It was windy and 13 degrees outside.

No matter what I tried I couldn't convince him to wear warm clothes, so in desperation I told him he needed to wear warm clothes because it might snow.

He excitedly got dressed in his warmest clothes then raced out of his bedroom to tell Chai that it might snow. FFS.

Chai got all excited and was jumping around trying to see if it was snowing. FFS.

I pre warned the other mums that the boys were expecting snow, whilst frantically  back pedalling and telling the boys it probably wouldn't snow.

When we got to our playdate the other mums all gleefully chatted to the boys about snow and pondered when it might snow.

Hah. No chance of that one blowing over.

The next day they were still wondering if it was going to snow. Funnily enough, it didn't.

If you've been following along with my stories the last few weeks you might remember my struggles to get a referral to a psychiatrist for Chai.

Last week I was at the farmers market when I got a phone call from the Dr. She told me that she'd found a great psychologist for Chai. FFS.

Once again I told her that he has a great psychologist but the education department requires a letter from a psychiatrist. She then went on to tell me that the referrals are normally handled by a paediatrician and that she knows I cancelled my follow up appointment with them. What that has to do with anything I don't know.

I told her that I need a referral to a psychiatrist so she said she'd call Chai's psychologist and talk to her about it. FFS.

She did nothing so I went to see the psychologist myself. We had a long chat and she is arranging a referral to a local psychiatrist (the one the Dr said I wouldn't be able to get in to. Apparently I can get in to see them and it'll take around six weeks!)

Then she told me that a Dr is usually the one who does referrals to psychiatrists! FFS.

I'm never seeing that Dr again!

Wednesday, 11 October 2017

September Empties

September was a pretty poor month for empties, I have lots of products that are nearly finished but not much that I managed to use up. I did manage to finish a perfume though!

Kora Organics Hydrating Day and Night Cream
I was surprised at how much I liked using the Kora mosturiser. I love that it's a day and night cream, so saves me buying two different products. It kept my dry skin feeling soft and comfortable through the cold winter weather. It worked really well mixed in with foundation to make a tinted moisturiser on those days I only wanted a light base. I'll definitely purchase it again. 

Too Faced Born This Way Foundation 
I'm in love with Born This Way, it's a beautiful foundation. It gives medium coverage, evens out my dark patches and is undetectable on my skin. Once I've finished a few foundations I'll be purchasing this (or I may just buy it anyway!)

Alaffia Deodorant
One of my two holy grail natural deodorants. If only it was available in Australia. I order mine from iHerb.

Lush Rose Jam Perfume
I was so sad to finish this as it's no longer available. It's one of my all time favourite scents. They've just released a body spray in the Rose Jam scent so I'll be buying it asap.

After these four I only have a few samples left, which I hope to finish this month.

I'm in love with the Kevyn Aucoin Illuminator, it's magic. If it was cheaper I would have purchased it already. Candlelight is the perfect shade for pale skinned girls. I mixed it in with my foundation for a beautiful glow.

The Body Shop Oils of Life Facial Oil was lovely too, it's one I'll consider purchasing in the near future.

Sunday, 8 October 2017

Thoughts of the week

1. Last week Kimberley told me about two websites where you can check the date your cosmetics were made. Oh my goodness! I checked three of my MAC lipsticks, one was eight years old!

2. If you'd like to check when your products were made, the websites are here and here

3. This is giving me a great starting point for my new year declutter (which I'm planning already!)

4. I'm starting to think about my plans for next year. I've got my skincare very close to where I want it to be, make-up is next. I'm thinking that 2018 will be the year of the no buy or very low buy.

5. I haven't figured out how I'll go about it yet, any suggestions? I think a total no buy is not realistic, however a very low buy is. I'm also considering going cruelty free and maybe even natural products only.

Friday, 6 October 2017

FFS Friday - I can dream

Trying to get things sorted for Chai at school is proving difficult. Very difficult. 

I'm starting to wonder why I'm bothering when I can just home school and save all the trouble (and money).

To get funding for a teachers assistant he needs to see a psychiatrist. 

I'm expecting that will be really expensive.

I took him to the Dr and asked for a referral to a psychiatrist, explained why I need it and why it has to be a psychiatrist not a psychologist or paediatrician.

As she's new to the area she said that she'd find out who to refer Chai to and send the referral to me.

A few days later I received a letter from a paediatricians office saying they'd received a referral for Chai. FFS.

He's already seen a paediatrician who can't help and it was a huge waste of $360.

I called the Dr's surgery, explained the situation and they said they'd call me back that day.


The next day the Dr called me and explained that she'd referred Chai to a paediatrician because they are experts in anxiety, sensory issues etc and they can arrange a referral to a psychiatrist. 

So she wanted me to spend $360 to get a referral? 

I explained to her once again that it had to be a psychiatrist and that he's already seen both a paediatrician and a psychologist.

I also explained to her that seeing the paediatrician cost $360 so I wasn't prepared to spend that sort of money just for a referral that she could provide!

She apologised for the confusion. WTF? There was no confusion, she just didn't listen to me when I explained to her the first time why it had to be a psychiatrist and no-one else. FFS.

As is usual with the country, there's only one paediatric psychiatrist down here so getting an appointment will take at least six months and mean that Chai won't have the report in time for the start of school next year. FFS.

All signs are pointing to no.

I am seriously wondering why I'm playing this game and why I am allowing my boy to be part of a schooling system that doesn't work for him. 

I'm kidding myself thinking that next year will be better, it'll be exactly the same. They'll still have unrealistic expectations that he won't be able to achieve. 

It's not healthy or normal for young children to be sitting still all day. They need freedom and movement.

The difference in Chai since he stopped school is amazing. Not only is he a lot happier, physically he's come a long way. He's so much stronger. His core strength is better, he's less floppy, has more stamina and is making progress so quickly. All this is due to him not sitting down all day at school. 

I wish I'd never sent him to school, that I'd trusted my instincts and kept him home where he needed to be. 

Off the grid or a nomadic lifestyle is looking more and more enticing. If only we could free ourselves of our financial constraints and escape.

I can dream. Not only for me, but for my babies.

Monday, 2 October 2017

What's in my spring make-up bag

Spring is here, the weather is warming up and it's time to crack out the bright, spring coloured make-up. I have a few products that I've nearly used up so I won't be swapping them out, but I am adding in some bright lipsticks and a few pretty eye shadows. I've swapped my foundation for a lighter base and my SPF 15 sunscreen for an SPF 50 version. 

I've been loving purple lately so pulled out my Nars Night Fairy eyeshadow. It's a gorgeous light, shimmery purple. I'm hoping to hit pan on it as I've had it for more years than I care to admit. 

The Natio palette was a birthday present from Tiger, the colours are perfect for spring/summer and it even has a bronzer!
Swatches from top: Eye of Horus Lazuli Blue, Nars Night Fairy, NYX Girl Talk, Colour Pop Bill and Laura Mercier Grey Pearl

The other eyeshadows I'll be using are Colour Pop Bill, NYX Girl Talk and Laura Mercier Grey Pearl (which isn't grey at all, it's taupe). 

I've also pulled out one of my all time favourite eye liners, Eye of Horus Lazuli Blue. It's a beautiful, bright blue that looks great with barely there eye shadow.

Base wise I'll be using two favourites, It Cosmetics CC+ and BYS Pure Silk serum foundation. I love the CC because it has an SPF of 50 which is ideal for spring and summer. 

The BYS Pure Silk foundation is a new favourite. Despite being very light it gives great, buildable coverage. I usually only need one layer with a second layer just on the problem spots. 
Swatches from top: Inika Blossom Lip Glaze, Shanghai Suzy Pink Lady, Ilia Lady Blossom, Shanghai Suzy Peony, Charlotte Tillbury Very Victoria

Now for my favourite, lip products. I've pulled out a few old favourites and added in some new beauties.

Shanghai Suzy Peony for a dark wash of pink and Pink Lady for a beautiful bright pink. Ilia Blossom Lady for a sheer wash of pinky mauve, Inika Blossom for days when I want a light shimmery pink and Charlotte Tillbury Very Victoria when I want the mlbb look. 

Do you change your make-up each season? What are your favourite spring products?

*Note: The BYS foundation and Inika Lip Glaze were provided for review. 

Sunday, 1 October 2017

Thoughts of the week

1. I'm loving watching Sophie Monk on the Bachelorette. My favourites are Apollo, Luke Jarrod and James.

2. A new eco shop has opened in town, I'm so excited that we can finally buy eco friendly products instead of having to order them online. I bought some Onya produce bags and have been using them instead of collecting plastic at the supermarket. 

3. Since discovering that I can recycle soft plastics at Coles, I've been astounded at how much plastic we use. Most of it is shopping bags, so I've starting taking my own bags. I put them in the front seat of my car so that I don't forget them and that's working well for me. I used to keep them in the boot and always forget them, with them in the front seat I can see them so always remember. 

4. Spring is in the air. I'm a winter girl but have to admit that I'm looking forward to the warmer weather. 

5. Pinks new album is out this month!

Friday, 29 September 2017

FFS Friday - Explosions

Oh my goodness. You know how you have those parenting days/weeks/months where you think you aren't going to survive? We've had one of those weeks. The stupid thing about weeks/days like that is I don't take care of myself which makes me feel even worse. I eat sugar in an effort to help my stress levels but it doesn't help, it makes me feel worse. Silly.

It's been cold and wet so the kids have been stuck inside. Eljay doesn't mind but Chai goes mad. He can't cope with being stuck inside all day. 

I've been taking them out as often as I can, going to the library, setting up obstacle courses in the house etc, but it's not enough for Chai.

His behaviour gets worse and worse, his sensory issues escalate and his anxiety is through the roof. I feel so helpless when he's like this. I can help his sensory problems but have no idea what to do about the anxiety. It's times like this I wonder how I will cope homeschooling him.

Yesterday I was sure that I was going to explode. I tried to arrange catch ups with a few friends but they were all busy. By 8am we'd been awake for three hours and Chai was off his trolley. Tantrums, hurting his brother, screaming etc.

I took them to a playground but it was freezing cold and Chai wouldn't play because his clothes were uncomfortable so we came back home again. He got changed and we headed to Kmart to get some slime in the hope that would keep them quiet for a few minutes. 

On the way home we decided to stop at the park. I didn't have a book or water bottle with us as we hadn't been planning on going out. I usually have a bottle of water in the car but we'd drunk it all so I'd taken it inside and forgotten to put it back in the car. 

The kids played whilst I sat on the chair fuming and trying to cheer myself up. After a few minutes some other kids came to play and the boys were happy. Their mother came over so we sat there chatting and I started feeling a little better. A while later a lady I'd met earlier in the week turned up so we all stood around chatting whilst our kids played. 

We stayed at the park for three and a half hours and got home in the late afternoon. We all felt so much better, it was wonderful. 

That's one thing I love about living in the country, everyone is so friendly. A few hours at the park is all we needed to restore our spirits and reset our mood. 

Here's hoping next week is a better week. 

Wednesday, 27 September 2017

Inika Lip Glaze

Recently I've been trying a few Inika products and loving most of them. Their foundation and BB cream are amazing, as is their primer. I tried their lip glazes a while ago but they didn't have a colour that I liked. They've reformulated and expanded the range so there are now seven gorgeous shades available. There is also a beautiful lip serum which I will be reviewing soon.

Cherry, Hazelnut, Rosewood, Coral, Blossom, Cappuccino, Cinnamon.
Cherry is a deep red with brown undertones.
Hazelnut is cool light taupe.
Rosewood is a cool rose.
Coral is a true coral.
Blossom is a neutral pale pink.
Cappuccino is a warm bronzey brown.
Cinnamon is warm browny apricot.

From bottom to top: Cherry, Hazelnut, Rosewood, Coral, Blossom, Cappuccino, Cinnamon.
I really love the texture of these, they feel weightless on my lips. Unlike matte liquid lipsticks, they aren't at all drying, my lips are left feeling hydrated and soft. Upon first application they look very glossy then settle to a luminous shine. I get around three hours wear before I need to reapply. They wear off evenly and the darker colours leave a stain of colour behind. There is no discernible flavour or fragrance. 

Inika Lip Glazes cost $35.00. The Lip Glazes are natural, vegan, contain 77% organic ingredients and are cruelty free. 

*Note: These products were provided for review.

Monday, 25 September 2017

The products that got me through winter

Winter has drawn to a close here in Australia, however the cold weather is lingering on. I'm looking forward to warmer weather whilst enjoying the last of the cold. 

The Physic Garden Winter herbal tea blend
I love herbal tea in winter. This beautiful blend was a gwp from The Physic Garden. I'm hoping they sell it next winter because it was beautiful. It's a lovely, refreshing and calming blend of lemon balm, peppermint, elder flower and calendula. 
The lemon balm and peppermint are anti-virals, they reduce anxiety and support digestion. Elder flower is an anti-bacterial, immune booster and de-congestant and Calendula supports the lymphatic system and boosts immunity. 

Heal Your Gut
Diatomaceous Earth aka fossil shell flour is one of the strangest things I've used. It's a tasteless powder, I take it with my Super Elixir. 
Initially I purchased it for Tiger. He had issues with reflux for years and nothing (even medication) was helping. One month of taking Heal Your Gut and his reflux was gone. He now takes this daily. 
I started taking it because it was there, I've found that it helps the stomach pains I get due to the scar tissue on my bowel (thanks to Crohn's). I haven't had any stomach pain since I've been taking Heal Your Gut. I also notice that I only got sick twice this year, last year we were sick all of winter. 

WelleCo The Super Elixir
I will never be without my beloved Super Elixir. I didn't want to love this because of the price ($85 for 300 grams), but it's a wonder product. When I don't take this I have no energy and struggle through the day, when I do take it I have energy all day long and don't feel tired. It's also reduced my sugar cravings and made my skin look clearer.

Natralus Paw Paw ointment
My all time favourite paw paw balm. I use it on my lips, cuticles, dry patches, sores and rashes. It's one of those all purpose products with endless uses. 

Little Innoscents Winter Blues Balm
This is our Vicks replacement. I find it gentler than Vicks (which burns my sensitive skin) and it's safe to use on the boys too. I put it on the soles of their feet, their chest and their back when they have a cold, are coughing or are blocked up. It quickly clears a blocked nose and helps reduce coughing. Even better, it's organic.
Amazonia Raw Immune
This is a wonder product. It can be taken daily to support your immune system, or when you are getting sick. I don't take it daily, just when I'm feeling unwell. If I'm coming down with a cold I often only need one or two doses. If I have the flu I'll take it daily to ease the symptoms and help me recover faster. 
This year when everyone else got that awful flu that lasted three weeks or more, I was mildly unwell for four days and that's it.