Friday, 4 May 2012

FFS Friday

It's Friday again! The day where you all get to enjoy laughing at the week that's been and I get to have a good whinge.

They still haven't sorted out hubby's pay! FFS.

Once again, this week they didn't give him all of the allowances he's entitled to. FFS.

Funny how when they are giving him a pay rise it takes 8 weeks and yet when they are reducing his pay it happens immediately. FFS.

They've now put him back to the pay rate that he was on when he first started working there, but they are trying to say that this rate includes the pay rise. FFS.

Clearly they think the guys are stupid enough to believe their lies. FFS.

Unfortunately for them the guys aren't stupid enough to believe their lies and they will soon find themselves with no staff. FFS.

As if that's not bad enough, they now expect them to work 10 and 1/2 hours but only pay them for 10 hours. FFS.

Friday I went to the Dr for my test results. I asked Mum to come up and help out with bub, but she didn't. FFS.

I spent the whole Dr's visit unsuccessfully trying to stop bub from tearing the surgery apart. FFS.

All my test results are normal, however the Dr still thinks I'm starting a flare up because my infection markers don't usually increase until I'm really sick. I'm clever like that. FFS.

I haven't started the antibiotics yet. FFS.

I've long suspected that hubby and I are going crazy. FFS.

This was confirmed for me on Saturday. FFS. 

We were at the hospital meeting our friends two day old baby which made both of us very clucky. FFS.

Hubby announces that we are trying for a baby. FFS.

It was the first I'd heard about it. FFS.

When we got home I asked hubby about it and he said that we'd had a discussion and agreed that we'd "see what happens". I don't recall that conversation at all. FFS.

This means that either hubby is having imaginary conversations with me, or I have totally lost my memory. FFS.

Maybe he had the discussion with Other Wife. FFS. 

Monday, hubby tells my brother we've decided we're only having one child. FFS.

That's another discussion I don't recall. FFS.

I'm sure he talks to me when I'm asleep and then calls it a conversation. FFS. 

On Sunday hubby wanted to watch the footy but didn't know what time it was on. FFS.

I checked the West Coast Eagles website which said the game was starting at 3.15pm. At 3.30pm I turned the tv on to see that the football was in the final quarter. FFS.

You'd think that since they are a West Australian team they would list the game time in WA time not Eastern Standards time, but obviously not. FFS.

Monday I lost my phone. FFS.

Not having my phone is like not having my right hand, I can't function without it. FFS.

I searched the house for it and couldn't find it anywhere. FFS.

In desperation I decided to ring it whilst walking around the house to see if I could hear it ringing. FFS.

Hubby answers my phone. FFS.

He'd gone to the gym with his phone and my phone. FFS.

He put my phone in his pocket thinking it was his wallet. FFS.

It looks nothing like his wallet. FFS.

I had to spend over an hour without my phone, it's the longest we've ever been apart. FFS.

Hubby got home and said "How funny was it that I took your phone with me?" FFS.

I rudely politely told him I didn't think it was at all funny. FFS.

I lied, I wasn't polite at all. FFS.

Naturally, bub chose that day to wake up 15 minutes after he'd been put down for his afternoon nap. FFS.

I spent 45 minutes trying to get him back to sleep. FFS.

I didn't get him back to sleep. FFS.

45 minutes trying to put bub to sleep without a phone to amuse me is a form of cruel and unusual torture. FFS.

Speaking of bub and sleep, he hasn't been. FFS.

He's been waking up every half an hour at night. FFS.

I've just realised that it's highly likely I stole the title idea for my monthly post to bub from Sarah. FFS.

Great, so now I steal other people's ideas. FFS.

Actually, I do that regularly, but I always give them credit for it. FFS.

Sorry Sarah! FFS.

It's only taken me about 10 months to realise that. FFS.

I blame it on sleep deprivation. FFS.

A few months ago bub was playing with a friend's book and he loved it because it had eyes that moved. He was absolutely fascinated with it so I decided to buy one for him. I've been searching for the book for two months and haven't been able to find it anywhere. FFS.

Every time I go past a book shop, newsagent, Target, Kmart, Big W or supermarket I check for the book. FFS.

I finally found it so I bought one for bub on the weekend. He's not interested in it at all. FFS.

Of course there can't be a FFS post without any mention of poo, so here it is:

I was changing bub's nappy after he'd done a huge poo. FFS.

He was helping out by holding a nappy in each hand and whacking both of the nappies onto his bottom. FFS.

When he wasn't whacking the nappy he was eating it. FFS.

As I was trying to check if there was any poo on the nappy, he swiftly put it into his mouth. FFS.

I still don't know if it had poo on it or not. FFS.

Last night at 11.53pm bub's sleeping and movement alarm went off. FFS.

It's the first time it's gone off. FFS.

When we went in there bub was fine, so we aren't sure if the alarm malfunctioned or if bub stopped breathing. FFS.

Either way, we are off to the Dr today. FFS.

Unsurprisingly hubby and I got no sleep last night after that. FFS.

Bub seems fine. FFS.

Yesterday Mum came to visit. I love my Mum but we have a problem. She's a toilet reader. FFS.

Now I don't have a problem with toilet reading, in fact I was quite partial to a bit of toilet reading myself prior to bub's arrival, however there are strict rules about toilet reading material. Clearly Mum doesn't know the rules. FFS.

The rule goes like this: If you are going to read something in the toilet it must be selected very carefully as toilet reading is the kiss of death for the said item. Once the reading material has been selected it must remain in the toilet and is only removed once it's been thoroughly read. When the item is removed from the toilet it must be immediately placed in the bin to avoid contaminating other reading material with Toilet Germs (similar to Boy Germs). FFS.

Toilet Germs spread. They contaminate anything they come into contact with, so it's vital that they do not come into contact with anything else. FFS.

Yesterday, without my knowledge, Mum selected her reading material (a Men's Health magazine, WTF?) and after reading it in the toilet bought it back out and sneakily put it in the magazine rack. FFS.

I wasn't aware of this until after the magazine had been returned to the magazine rack. FFS.

Now I have to throw out all of my magazines as they have been contaminated with Toilet Germs. FFS.

If you don't hear from me again it's because our whole house has been consumed by Toilet Germs due to my failure to throw out all the magazines last night. FFS.

Dear Baby G

1 comment :

  1. hahaha you make me feel so much better every Friday!! I do the same thing with toys and she plays with nothing but my one and only car key :/


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