Friday, 21 February 2014

FFS Friday - Smurf Hands

Sunday Chai accidentally whacked Eljay in the head with the vacuum cleaner. FFS.

Really, really hard. FFS.

Tiger saw it all so yelled at Chai when it happened. This meant that we had two screaming babies. FFS.

Poor Eljay had a huge lump on his head. FFS.

This had to happen two days before we were taking him to the Dr to get his immunisations. FFS.

I put arnica on it and by some miracle he didn't have a bruise. Not FFS.

Every now and again I like to make believe that I am a crafty mumma. FFS.

I am so not a crafty mumma. FFS.

This week I decided to make cloud dough for Chai to play with. Being the crafty mumma that I'm not, I got fancy and added food colouring into the mix. 

Blue food colouring. 

I ended up with blue hands. FFS.

Smurf hands. FFS.

Then I discovered that food colouring doesn't wash off. FFS.

Or scrub off. FFS.

Or come off with eucalyptus. FFS.

Or nail polish remover. FFS.

Or that horrible abrasive workers soap. FFS.

Or metho. FFS.

Or turps. FFS.

I gave up after that. FFS.

I had smurf hands for three days. FFS.

Chai had smurf hands too. FFS.

When he was playing with the cloud dough he got smurf hands too. FFS.

For some reason his hands were back to normal the next day. FFS.

Wednesday Tiger had a colonoscopy and endoscopy. FFS.

This meant that he had to fast on Tuesday. FFS.

He gets hangry and is awful when he hasn't eaten. FFS.

By 7.40am he was driving me crazy. FFS.

He kept on wanting to eat things and I was constantly telling him he couldn't eat then he'd get annoyed with me. FFS.

Thankfully he'd snapped out of it by 9am and was being pleasant again. Not FFS.

The tests were all clear. Not FFS.

A few weeks ago I decided to get some water balloons for Chai. Not FFS.

It's been a long time since I've had water balloons but I remember how much fun they were when I was little. I remember filling them up under the tap, so I got them home, told Chai I had something fun for him to play with and then tried to fill them up. It didn't work. FFS.

Nowadays you need a special thingo to fill up water balloons. FFS.

And I couldn't find one anywhere. FFS.

So I had a very disappointed little boy who couldn't play with the water balloons that I'd got him all excited about. FFS.

I even googled how to blow up water balloons. FFS.

After three weeks of hunting I finally found a water balloon blower upper. Not FFS.

To my great satisfaction, this week Tiger finally had a FFS worthy moment with Chai. Not FFS.

It gave him a taste of what things are like for me when he's away. Not FFS.

It was totally his own fault. FFS.

When he takes Chai's nappy off he'll often take it off when Chai is standing up, he just undoes it and whips it off. He did that Wednesday morning, only to discover that Chai had done a poo. FFS.

Tiger had poo all over him, the wall, the floor and Chai. Hahahaha.

When he told me all I could do was laugh. Welcome to my world sunshine. Not FFS.

I'm such a great wife. FFS.

That's all I have to whinge about this week. If you'd like to read more whinges, head over to Sarah and Brads blog

As a parting gift, I leave you with this photo of a doll that MIL got for Chai.

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