FFS Friday - Confused.

Hello Friday. I'm so happy to see you.
Have you all had a good week?
If you're back in lockdown, I hope you're coping okay. If you're not I'm always happy to chat.

Is it just me or have a lot more people jumped on the covid conspiracy bandwagon? I've seen some really crazy posts on facebook recently, they don't even make sense. I saw one person saying that there would be military law soon. What's that got to do with covid? I don't understand.

It's also funny how people are sensationalising the news. Tiger read a post this morning from someone he trusts that said Westpac is no longer accepting cash deposits. He believed it. I didn't. 
After one minute research I discovered the truth, Westpac is limiting cash deposits to $7,500 per account per day. Totally different isn't it?
What's the point of bending the truth like that? It just gets people worked up for no reason. Seems pretty nasty to me. 

So. We've put in an application with a school. For both the boys.
We aren't in the zone and are not eligible for their special needs program so there's a good chance that the boys won't get in, but they said that they would consider our application.

I'm not sure if it's a good idea or not. Chai's psych, OT and tutor all say that it's a bad idea. I'm really unsure. The school we've applied to is the only one that has any chance of being suitable. If we can't get in to this school then home schooling is our only option.

I feel quite sick at the thought of them going to school and it not working out, I don't want to end up back where we were a few years ago when we started home schooling. I'll recognise the signs sooner so it won't be as bad as it was but I still hate to think that I'm adding stress and trauma to Chai's life.

Honestly though, I need a break. That's mainly what this is about. My need for a break. I know that sounds (and feels) selfish, but I am so burned out and this is the only way that I can get any time out.

The boys have been with me 24/7 since they were born. I've spent four nights away from them their whole lives. Two nights when I had Eljay and two nights when I had my ankle surgery. That's it. They're nine and seven.   

I'm burned out. I'm exhausted and I need a rest. If putting them in school is how I get a rest then that's what I need to do. Plus, I think it might be good for them. They've both been talking about going to school and they quite like the idea. Chai is older now so more able to communicate with me about what's going on, so if there are any problems then he will be able to tell me straight away.

My plan is to send them for the last term (if they're accepted), see how it goes and if it doesn't go well then I'll use the time they're at school to get all set up for home schooling next year. If we try school and it doesn't work I'll just accept that this is what we're doing and this is our life now.
If they don't get in to school then that's a sign. Either way, I need to deal with things and move forward, break or no break.

Have a beautiful weekend. We're in for some wild weather Sunday which I'm looking forward to. We'll spend Saturday enjoying the sun and Sunday enjoying the rain. Perfect.