Friday, 17 November 2017

FFS Friday - Maybe

This week Chai went back to school. I sent him despite my soul screaming at me not to send him back. Sunday night I couldn't sleep because I didn't want to send him back to school.

Monday morning went okay. I was on the school grounds with Eljay and Tiger, so the deputy popped in to see me and told me that she'd been in Chai's classroom, that the teacher had been giving him appropriate breaks but he'd refused to use his wobble cushion or take his shoes off. She said his behaviour was up and down and that if he wasn't using the sensory tools they offered him then there wasn't much they could do.


He's been traumatised by his teacher, he's back in class with the same teacher, he's had about nine weeks off school, he's extremely anxious about school and they're expecting everything to go perfectly on his first day back.


Now maybe I'm ultra sensitive when it comes to Chai, but really? WTF is wrong with the school? Is it me or them? I just don't understand how they think the way they do.

It's the little things that get to me. For example. Last Friday I took Chai to school for the last ten minutes, just to break the water and see all his friends. The deputy came to the classroom with us and when we got to the door of his room Chai sat down on the bench and didn't want to go in. The deputy and I were trying to convince him to go in when the deputy said to him "But you have to go to school." To which Chai replied "No I don't, I like doing school at home". Heh, that's my boy.

He doesn't have to go to school. If it's not working for him he won't go to school.

Just because he's a child doesn't mean that anyone has the right to dominate him or force him to do things. If it's not okay to treat an adult like that then it's not okay for a child either. 

Imagine dealing with indignities on a daily basis. Monday Chai needed to go to the toilet during class. He asked his teacher and she said no. I kid you not. Can you imagine that happening to an adult? Imagine if you were at work and had to ask to go to the toilet. That in itself would be bad enough, but what if your boss said no? How ridiculous. Yet we think treating children like that is acceptable. 

None of the children are allowed to go to the toilet during sports. Busting or not, they can't go. One girl wet her pants because of that. 

Children who need to go to the toilet too frequently during class time are required to give one of their reward things to the teacher. The adult equivalent of that would be paying $5 to your boss every time you needed to use the toilet. Not okay. Maybe society in general thinks treating children like that is okay, but I don't.

I know my views are not the norm and I'm okay with that. This is why I struggle with the school system. Really struggle. It's just not right. Especially not for sensitive souls like Chai. He just doesn't cope. He shouldn't be forced to cope. He will not be forced to cope.

Wednesday he was excited about going to school and wanted to leave the house at 8am. As we were walking into the school he asked me why he has to go to school. I told him he doesn't have to go to school but that he goes because he wants to see his friends.

When we got to the classroom and he saw what was on the agenda for the day he decided to stay until the end of lunchtime. Winning. Maybe school will work out for him. Maybe it won't. As long as he's happy I'm happy. 

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