Friday, 12 August 2016

FFS Friday - Say what?

Tiger asks me all sorts of silly, irrelevant questions, it's one of his fortes. FFS.

I used to answer them, now I mostly ignore them unless they're really silly. FFS.

It can be all sorts of things, his capacity for stupid questions never ceases to amaze me. FFS.

Some of them are lazy, others are just stupid. FFS.

Like yesterday. He was walking towards my computer and at the same time asked me "Is your computer on?" 
By the time he'd finished the question he was standing in front of my computer. 
I'm thinking to myself "HTF would I know? Why don't you look yourself since you're standing right next to it?" I didn't say anything, I just ignored him. 

Then there's questions that are just too stupid to ignore. Like last night. Here's how it went down.
We're laying in bed.
Tiger: I wonder if I'll be too hot in these pants?
Me: I don't know. 
Tiger: Maybe I should take them off?
Me: (silence)
Tiger: Should I take them off?
Me: Up to you, I don't know how you feel.
Tiger: Is the flannel sheet on?
Me: What do you think?
Tiger: I don't know.
Me: Really? Did you really just ask me that? You're lying on it. Can you feel the sheet?
Tiger: Yes.
Me: And what does it feel like? Does it feel like flannel?
Tiger: No.
Me: So what do you think the answer is? Is the flannel sheet on?
Tiger: No.
Me: Right. So are you going to be too hot?
Tiger: Probably not.
Me: Right.

Two minutes later he got out of bed and took his pants off. FFS.

I've got no idea why he asks me such silly questions. Why does he even think of asking those questions? How does he think I'll know how he feels? I don't get it. It's like he wants me to tell him what to do, even though he knows that's not my style. Clearly he lives in hope. Too bad he's going to be permanently disappointed.


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