I've been thinking a lot lately about how and why I shop. I know that I don't shop like a normal person, I don't buy makeup because I need it, I buy it because I want it and to relieve stress or fill a need. It got me thinking back to when I first started shopping.
I'd just split up with my boyfriend. He wasn't just any boyfriend, I thought he was The One. Looking back, he could well have been The One, his actions ensured that he wasn't. The break up was my decision but nevertheless I was heartbroken. More heartbroken than I've ever been in my life. It took me about five years to get over him and it is one of the hardest things I've been through.
I was living in the city, on my own, with only one or two friends and I was suffering. I decided I needed a new look so I went into the city, bought some new clothes and they really cheered me up. I looked better so I felt better. Then I bought a new lipstick, got complimented on it and that cheered me up too. Next I bought a bracelet and that also cheered me up. That's when I started shopping. And I didn't stop. Despite the fact that I am no longer heartbroken I still shop. Now I shop when I'm stressed. I'm stressed half of my life (when Tiger is away). As well as stress relief it's also a habit. Now when I go to the shops I'll automatically look to see if anything new has been released.
I wonder why shopping is a stress relief? I think back to the things I used to do to relieve stress, prior to shopping. I used to do martial arts and ride my motorbike. Riding a motorbike is out of the question as I don't have one anymore anymore. I could do martial arts when Tiger is home, I really need to do it when he's not here but that's not an option at the moment as I have no-one to look after the kids. So how else can I relieve stress without shopping?
Meditation and dancing. I can do both of them when Tiger is away. I don't have to leave the house, I don't have to prepare which is just what I need when I'm flying solo. The boys and I regularly turn up the music and dance. Meditation I do when I'm feeding Eljay. It's the perfect time. He's quiet, I'm sitting still and quiet, it's ideal.
So that's my non-psychologist view on why I shop.
Got any other stress relieving tips for me? I'd love to hear them.