When we got our puppy Bella I was worried that she'd be a handful and give me trouble. Surprisingly (or not) it's not Bella who is giving me trouble, it's the boys. FFS.
Turns out Eljay loves eating dog biscuits. FFS.
And water out of the dog bowl. FFS.
And wet, doggy kisses. FFS.
He lets Bella lick his tongue. Gross. FFS.
Having a dog has further encouraged Chai to constantly pretend he's a dog. FFS.
Last week he poo'd outside twice. FFS.
Then Bella ate it. FFS.
When I asked him why he didn't use the toilet he told me "I'm a dog Mummy". FFS.
He has a great imagination that I want to encourage, but I draw the line at him pooing outside. FFS.
I constantly catch him on all fours weeing like a dog. FFS.
We need to register Bella. It costs $50 if she's not desexed and $20 if she is. She's too young to be desexed and will be desexed as soon as she can be, but the council expects us to pay the full rate and won't refund it after she's been desexed. FFS.
That seems pretty unreasonable. Fair enough if she was old enough to be desexed and we hadn't bothered, but we can't get her desexed until she's 6 months old. FFS.
Also, a condition of getting a rescue puppy is that you have them desexed, so they know it's definitely going to happen. FFS.
Stupid council. FFS.
Eljay has entered the 'put everything in the toilet' stage. FFS.
So far he's put: my toothbrush head, a make-up brush, three toilet rolls, lots of food, a water bottle, several cars and a thong into the toilet. FFS.
I never know what I'm going to find when I lift the toilet lid. FFS.
It's often the highlight of my day. FFS.
That concludes my weekly whinge. Now it's your chance to get your whinge on.